Into the Unknown....

 

If you are a lover of all things Disney, you will be very familiar with the song from Frozen 2- "Into the Unknown,"

And if you live in a house with children who love all things Disney....AND love musicals....AND love to sing, you will be VERY familiar with this song. 

In fact, if this is the case, you might be so familiar with this song that you may feel that you don't ever need to hear it again...because it has been sung over and over again in your presence...and the first impression you had of the song (that it would never get old) has proven to be a big fat lie!  

THAT is indeed where I am.  

But I have to admit, despite my complete and utter loathing for this once beloved song, I may have sang it in my head this morning as my children headed out the door to school...you know....into the unknown.

I had a moment last week, after reading all the inspirational and encouraging messages on Facebook about school and mask wearing (said with heavy sarcasm), where I wondered if it was really the right thing to send them back.  For me, this moment didn't have much to do with masks, or political statements, or conspiracy theories, or even my lack of wanting to be responsible for home school.  And as much as I hate the idea of our amazing teachers feeling unsafe and forced to teach in uncertain circumstances, this pause was not about that.  

This particular pause was about uncertainty...which caused me to feel that all too familiar rush of anxiety.  You know, that little voice that takes over the rational part of your brain and starts saying "What if???"

And I realized pretty quickly that this wasn't just the normal "Back to School" anxiety I usually feel for a moment before school starts.  This was the uncertainty and anxiety that accompanies sending children back to school in the middle of a pandemic...which is pretty new for all of us, right?  

But I have come to understand that for me, the circumstances of the world right now are not really about fear.  I don't necessarily feel incredibly afraid, although I think that is definitely a part of it all. I have personally chosen to try to keep fear in check...

Sorry Fear...it's not about you today!

I believe the uncertainty I feel is coming from change.  Change is a tricky one.  It can be good, or it can be bad.  OR, if that wasn't confusing enough, it can be both good and bad at the same time!  No wonder change can be so difficult.  But this year's theme has been change.  And a lot has changed all at once, which  has left many of us feeling disoriented...kind of like when we were kids and went to a Birthday party with a piniata.  You know, you would be blindfolded and then spun around and around before being turned loose with a giant stick.  (Ummm....how is this is a children's game?)  I have to admit I liked this one better than pin the tail on the donkey though...I mean, who came up with that one?  "Gather round children...I'm going to cover your eyes so you can't see, spin you around until you're dizzy and can barely walk, and then set you loose to tape a tail to a donkey's butt."  You get my point...

ANYWAY, back to the pinata.  Disoriented!  That is how I have been feeling among all this change.  And you know what often accompanies disorientation?  You got it, Fear!

Well look at that, Fear!  It did end up being about you after all!

The bottom line is we are experiencing significant changes in world that has felt very secure and structured for some time now.  And it's causing us to feel disoriented and afraid.  But guess what...that is all very normal.  And not only is it normal...it's totally ok!  When we are faced with change we have to find a new normal that helps us feel secure again.  AND, we have to work through our feelings of anxiety as they come, because they will.  

One of the best ways I have found to work through feelings of fear in the midst of instability is what I like to call the "rubber band" technique.  When you think of a rubber band, you automatically think flexibility, right? And it is definitely important to learn how to be flexible...although this is easier said than done (especially when you are feeling anything but flexible.)  But there is so much more to a rubber band than the ability to bend.  A rubber band is great at holding things together and keeping things securely in place.  What are some things we can work on  "holding together" and "securing in place" during times of fear and change?

What about our families?  Our friends?  The relationships we have with others?

How about our physical health?  The ability to have a body that works well and feels good.

What about our negative perceptions and attitudes?  Is it possible to secure them in place and keep them bound so they don't run havoc through our minds and words to others?

What about our faith?  Our beliefs?  Our Integrity?  How can we secure these things in our hearts so they can be anchors in our times of trouble?

And what how about hope?  Can we hold together a hope in future days?  Hope that things can and will get better?  Hope that we can adapt and overcome?  

When we focus on being flexible, adaptable, holding things together, and securing things in place, it becomes easier to overcome fear of the unknown and the anxiety of change.  Change can often be necessary, and good!  Even when it may look like it's not.  Many of us would question being able to find good among the circumstances of this pandemic we are experiencing...but it always depends on how you look at it...as shown in this fabulous video clip.

So, as we go out "Into the Unknown," and face new challenges, may we strive to evolve through our fears of change and uncertainty.  I am a true believer that things work out, and regardless of the challenges we may face, I truly believe they will.  And as they do, we can focus on bigger issues...

Like figuring out why it never occurred to us as kids that Pin the Tail on the Donkey is kind of a creepy game...Maybe that's why we all need therapy!  

Who knew?

Have a wonderfully, mediocre week my friends!

Becky

XOXOXO

The Elephant in the Room

 

Can we please talk about the 

elephant in the room?

Is it just me, or has anyone else been feeling like there's a lot of contention going on lately?  Can we talk about what I feel may be contributing to this contention?  It really is the elephant in the room that no one seems to want to discuss.  

But I like rooms, and I like elephants, so I figure what's the big deal, right? 

So,I recently had a conversation that changed the way I have been thinking.  This conversation was about how difficult it can be to make decisions during this interesting time we find ourselves living in. There's a lot of confusion out there, and with all the differing opinions available to us, it can be really challenging to make choices. This is true even when it comes to what once would have been a simple insignificant choice.  For example, Simply stating you are planning on making a trip to the store can trigger a slew of differing reactions from people.

I know you're familiar with what I'm talking about here.  We've all seen it.  The varying circumstances of our world and society have created this unique situation where our conversations with others, posts on social media, and the ongoing narrative between news outlets leaves us scratching our heads in confusion. We often find ourselves forming an opinion, but how can we not?  We are hard-wired to use discernment in all situations.  

But let's be honest...that's not the issue here.  The elephant in the room that no one really wants to confront is division...particularly the division that results from choosing a "side" and then taking a stand. The differing opinions on all sides of the issues we face on the daily can easily cause division...which then leads to contention.

In the midst of the challenges we are facing as a nation and country right now, we find ourselves constantly coming to a fork in the road where we need to make a choice based on what we know and believe. This is nothing new...it's actually the hallmark of America.  We're free to make choices, and free to choose differently from another.

But lately, something has shifted in this inspired dynamic people are finding themselves in conflict with others because of differing opinions and choices. And sometimes these differences can create problems in our relationships and with those we love and respect.

I don't think we mean for this to happen.  We feel so passionately about an issue that when someone feels the opposite, it can create strong feelings of frustration. I believe that this is often the result of Putting Passion before principle. Allow me to explain:

My hubby and I had "date night" in the living room the other night. How did we accomplish this with kids at home?  Great question! 

It began with us and the kids all lounging on the couch and deciding we wanted to watch a movie. Ryan and I insist on being the ones to choose the movie this time, which often ends up being some "old" movie from the (*gasp) 80's or 90's. This clears the room quickly and the hubs and I are suddenly left alone with the remote and the popcorn.  Whamo!  Date night!  

So we decided to watch a great 80's classic, "The Karate Kid." We spent much of the movie quoting our favorite lines as they came on ("Show me, Sand the floor!")  My hubby, Ryan, prefers the line during the ending fight scene when Johnny's ANNOYING little friend (who actually looks a lot like a rat) yells from the sidelines "Get him a body bag!" and then does this ear-piercing rat-like chuckle (See clip below.

Unfortunately, Ryan has mastered this line, complete with the annoying laugh, and likes to say it over and over and over again. (This helped with the clearing of the room before the show started as well). But it eventually grew on me, and by the end we were both saying it to see who could do it better. (You know you want to say it now too!)

Anyway, this movie night resulted in me wanting to watch the second Karate Kid movie, which I did the next night when Ry was at work.  While this night was much less entertaining (because Ryan wasn't home of course) I noticed a Mr. Miyagi phrase that really had an impact on me:

Ah, Mr. Miyagi...so full of wisdom and truth! We all need a little more Miyagi in our lives...

So, this got me thinking.  How often do we act, or rather react, out of passion rather than focusing on the principle?  When we feel passionate about something, it triggers strong emotions, and often we let those emotions lead out.  When we do this, we can act impulsively and say or do things we might not otherwise say, which takes away from the principle we feel so strongly about in the first place.  It would be much more effective in our interactions with others if we learn to take the emotion out (as much as possible) and focus on the principle.  When we do this we are using the logical part of our brain rather than the emotional part, and it helps to really understand what is being said.  And we might discover that we agree a lot more than we disagree. 

As many of you know, I'm a religious person and the beliefs I have often affect the way I look at things. As I was thinking about differing opinions and conflict, I thought about this video clip that comes from a talk given by a religious leader in my faith (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints).  In this clip, Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf uses a story about an elephant to explain how truth can often get mixed up with perception.

I love the elephant story in this! Notice how all the men were describing their truth according to their own experience.  And they each thought they were "right" and the others were wrong.  BUT THEY WERE ALL RIGHT. Thinking of this helped me to understand that much of the contention and differing opinions among us are due to "what part of the elephant" we are touching...our own personal experiences. We may not see the truth in someone else's opinion because we are busy focusing on what WE know, rather than considering what we might NOT know.

So here's what I hope, and here's what I'm going to try.  The next time I'm having a conversation with someone who has a differing opinion, I'm going to take a step back and try to understand what part of the elephant they are touching and where their opinion is coming from. Then I'm going give them the space to believe that truth.  I will be respectful and not discount their opinion based on mine, because they may know something that I don't.  And my hope is that by doing this, it will cause less division among us as neighbors, family members, and friends.  Because the division is what hurts us the most.  

What would my good friend Mr. Miyagi have to say about this?

“To make honey, young bee need young flower, not old prune.” – Mr. Miyagi

Actually, that has absolutely nothing to do with this conversation, but I just wanted to see who is listening.  Ha!  

But really, I think this bit of advice is a good one to follow:

“Don’t forget to breathe, very important.” – Mr. Miyagi

Let's all just breathe...

XOXOXO

Becky

PS....

Mr. Miyagi approves this message....

******Leave me a comment so I know who's here!  I'd love to hear from you!*******

First Grade Funnies- Round 2

Hello Friends!

I'm back, as promised, with my weekly Friday post: First Grade Funnies...

If you think that's a lame name, you're correct!  It's just the best I could come up with after staring out the window for half an hour trying to come up with something creative.  So, if any of you better ideas, comment below (or on my instagram @mediocremarypoppins) and let me know.  What can I say, sometimes you just come up with lame things!  It's part of being mediocre...😜

For those who may not know, on Friday's I am going to be posting entries from my teenage daughter's first-grade school journals.  During quarantine, we had way too much fun looking through them and laughing.  They are just too good to not share with the world!  You're welcome...

I have to start with a quick update from the last journal entries I posted.  Remember this entry about the cows and 9/11?  We had no idea what cows had to do with anything?

I'm sure you will be ecstatic to know that the mystery has been solved!  I know you've been losing sleep over this one so I wanted to share some information with you.  My cute friend Lisa, who also happens to be a Mrs. Rogers (different from my girl's first-grade teacher) sent me this:

APPARENTLY, there is a children's book called "14 Cows for America."  It's a really cute and inspiring story that actually does have to do with 9/11...so that must be where she got it from.  Maybe the librarian read it to them?  Anyway, check it out if you're interested.  Mystery solved!  We can all sleep better tonight.  

You're welcome Chuck!  

Ok, back to this week's Journal entries:

#1- "The Ants"

This one starts out as a sweet little story:

"First, I was outside.."  Aww, kids love to play outside!  How sweet!

"Next, I saw some ants..."  Aww, kids love to find little creatures!  How sweet!

"Last, I stepped on them."  Aww, kids......wait WHAT?  

Suddenly this sweet little story took a dark turn.  Who's kid is this anyway?  

And that's not the worst of it.  The hubby and I were concerned when we noticed the pictures at the top...all the people seemed to be....ahem....very anatomically accurate:

😳😳😳😳😳

We were relieved to find out the circles were SLEEVES.  

Phew!  

#2- "April Fools!"

Ok, there are definitely some issues I'd like to address here:

First, the hubby and I have freakishly long necks.  I mean, what IS that?  I take comfort in knowing my neck seems to be a bit shorter than his, but still.  Freakishly long.

Second, the hubby's hair.  "Boy hair" must be really tricky to draw for first graders. In my previous post my poor hubby was drawn with horns.  This time, he's...well, he looks like....a flat head...dude...person.  Luckily, my hair didn't turn out too bad here.  But the hubs has that freakish neck AND a flat head...tough break!  Good thing he has such a sparkling personality...😉

And last, did you catch this comment?

Interesting how it's not "April Fools" or "Got ya!"  Could have been any number of small phrases a first grader could write.  But she simply chooses "Fools!"  

Could this be a subconcious message about how she really views us?  

I don't have the slightest clue where she would get that idea from!

Moving on...

#3- "The Nap"

Here, it's April Fools again- but this time the story has a little twist...and some AMAZING pictures.

Translation:

"Last April Fools day we tricked my Dad into sleeping.  We put Make-up on him and when he woke up, he was surprised."

Ummm, I'm pretty sure they didn't have to do much to "trick" their Dad into sleeping.  😜  The man's nickname is "Screen Saver."  

And do I really need to say anything about the pictures?  I mean, seriously 😂😂😂😂  

Nailed it!

So that's a wrap for this week's First Grade Funnies.  I'll catch ya'll next Friday.

Have an exceptionally mediocre day!

XOXOXO

Becky

Why is Mrs. Rogers a Turkey?

Hello Friends!

I feel like we could all use a little humor right now, so I wanted to share something with you.  

Recently during quarantine, we did a little cleaning (emphasis on "little"...mostly we watched Netflix).  While cleaning out some books we came across three notebooks that I had kept.  All 3 of my teenage daughters had the same amazing first-grade teacher, Mrs. Rogers, and she had them write in a little journal each day during the year.  (Shout out to Denise Rogers, best first-grade teacher EVER!) I think she would write a prompt on the board and they were required to write something about it in their notebook.  By the end of the year, they had a little treasure to take home.  Finding them was fun because it provided us with some much-needed laughs.  It's amazing how hilarious first graders can be...without even trying!

So I made a mental note that when I got my blog up and going I would do a post once a week that included some of these journal entries.  In the future, I will be posting them on Fridays for a little something called "First Grade Funnies." But for this week I thought I'd do one today just for fun!

So first up today we have what I'm calling "The Cow" entry.  This just might be one of my favorites!

Ok, let's break it down.  From what we could tell, this is what it is supposed to be saying:

"I thought it was sad to give 14 cows to America.  I liked it too.  I was sad that the towers fell in 911."

I have several questions about this entry:

1)  If it was SAD to give the cows to America, why are there happy faces?

2) Why do the cows have long horns?  (Or antlers?)

3) Um...when did we have to give 14 cows to America?  And...why?  Why on earth would we have to give cows to America?  And what do Cows have to do with 9/11?  

If Mrs. Rogers happens to see this, I would LOVE to know what the subject for the prompt was this day...

OK, next up we have "I Love Mis Rochrs"....

When we looked at this one I said to my daughter "Why did you draw Mrs. Rogers as a turkey?"  

Apparently, that's a table and chairs with Mrs. Rogers sitting in one of the chairs.  Oopsie!  My bad!

And Finally, we have "The Fam".  

Here is a sweet little picture of our family enjoying some summer fun!  Did you notice anything interesting?

Did you happen to notice THIS????

Apparently, that was because Ryan had spikey hair at the time...and that is the way a first grader interprets spikey hair!  

At least she didn't attempt to draw this hair don't....

The Hubby learned it was worth paying the $20 for someone to cut his hair, instead of doing it by himself.  

Important life lessons....

XOXO,

Becky

Taking a Corona-cation!

Hey There!

Who's familiar with the movie "What About Bob?"  It's an oldie but a goodie, and I dare say one of my all time favorites.  If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it...but don't cancel me if you hate it.  

Anyway, for those who haven't had the pleasure, allow me to give you a quick recap (but skip past the pictures if you don't want spoilers!)....

A brilliant psychiatrist, Dr. Leo Marvin (played by a young Richard Dreyfuss) who has recently released a new book entitled "Baby Steps", takes on a new client named Bob Wiley (Played by Bill Murray)...

Add caption

Bob has a lot of "issues"...and he becomes panicked when Dr. Marvin takes off for a Summer vacation with "the fam" in New Hampshire.  So...with his pet goldfish around his neck, he hops on a bus and follows him...

Dr. Marvin becomes upset and tells Bob it is highly unprofessional for him to be there and tells him to go home and he will follow up with him in a few weeks.  But Bob becomes hysterical and insists that he is really bad off and begs him for help...

So Dr. Marvin tells Bob he is going to prescribe him a special treatment and he writes him a prescription that reads: "Take a vacation from your problems."  He tells Bob he is giving him permission to take a vacation.  Not a vacation from work, or anything else.  Just from his problems.

Which he does...while deciding to stay in New Hampshire for a while for a REAL vacation...

So, Bob pushes his way into Dr. Marvin's life and wins over his family who think he's great.  He ends up manipulating every situation he can to work his way into Dr. Marvin's family, which ends up driving Dr. Marvin into a psychotic breakdown...

So essentially, the patient drives the psychiatrist crazy which is a brilliant conundrum for a movie!

Seriously guys, you have GOT to watch it! 

ANYWAY...

You may be asking "What is the purpose of this post?"  Actually, I can't remember now...

JUST KIDDING!

The point is this...there are a lot of crazy things going on in the world right now.  2020 has not, in many ways, turned out how most of us expected.  And with the Corona-virus, mystery seeds being sent in the mail (what the?), killer bees, locusts, protests, and a handful of other things going on, it is super easy to get down.  If you weren't experiencing any kind of anxiety or depression before this all hit, you probably are now!  So what can we do?  

Here's where "What about Bob" comes in...I, who has no authority to prescribe anything, am going to suggest to you a "Vacation from your problems."  Let's call it a "Corona-cation."  

It is more important than ever to be paying attention to our mental health, and the mental health of our loved ones.  It is easy to get stuck under a dark cloud of depression and worry that ends up affecting the way we show up for life each day.  Feelings of hopelessness lead to negative thoughts.  Negative thoughts lead to negative behaviors.  And negative behaviors lead to....well, you get the picture!  Covid is not going away any time soon, so while we need to find ways to embrace the "new normal" we also need to be aware of  how we are coping.

So what does a Corona-cation look like?  Allow me to suggest 10 things to consider:

1) Turn off the media!  Seriously, just turn it all off for a few days (even a few hours) and let yourself regroup.  Notice the things that are still good in life. Turn off the news, stop checking all the drama happening on social media, and silence all the notifications on your phone.  Things may not be perfect, but remember I'm not about perfection anyway!  We can ALWAYS find something good, even in the midst of chaos.

2) Start each day listening to something positive...a podcast, a religious message, an upbeat playlist, etc.  Fill your day with positive messages of hope.

3) Find time each day to be still.  Amazing things happen in stillness.

4) Do something out of the ordinary.  Confession: I abandoned all the crazy and spent an afternoon painting rocks with two of my daughters the other day.  Totally out of the norm, but it ended up being really relaxing and fun.  It's amazing how therapeutic something like art can be.  

5) Give yourself permission to be happy.  This may seem like a weird one, but hear me out.  The constant exposure to negativity can cause us to feel like we shouldn't be happy, even if we feel like it.  Why?  Because people are sick and suffering and happiness can seems like its disrespectful or blasphemous sometimes.  But I'm here to tell you, feeling happy does not mean we don't care or that we are not concerned.  Happiness is a choice...a state of mind.  We always have a choice when it comes to our feelings.  You can choose to be happy and concerned all at the same time.  

6) Go to bed!  Ok, I am being a complete hypocrite on this one because I am totally a night owl, BUT I absolutely believe in it's importance. Sleep is so important to out mental health...more so than you probably realize.  We need restful and efficient sleep in order to feel well.  

7) Exercise.  I don't think I really need to back this one up.  It's pretty simple.  Exercise=endorphins (happy brain chemicals)=better mood.  Nuff said...

8) Laugh!  We don't laugh enough.  Last night our family watched "America's Funniest Home Movies" together and it felt so good to just laugh.  Or, watch "What about Bob."  😀

9) Serve others.  (This one's my fave).  There is something magical about helping others and looking outside of ourselves.  

10) Spend time outside.  The sun is our friend!  Just wear your sunscreen...

So there you have it!  10 ways to Corona-cation without even booking a flight.  And remember, you don't have to do it all at once: 

XOXOXO,

Becky